Monday, January 4, 2010

are you kidding me?

I am so over this foster care bull shit. DFACS ran a background check on my MIL so that she could care for Lil' Man when I went to my Dr's apt in Atlanta. 

My agency said that my MIL could care for Lil' Man while I am having my surgery (we will be gone for five days).  They informed me that I needed to get a copy of the background check from DFACS.  Well our DFACS worker refuses to give us a copy of the background check.  She said that the state paid for it, and if our agency wants one, then can pay for their own WTF?

We don't have enough time to wait for a stupid background check to come back.  So it looks like Lil' Man is going to have to go to respite for five days, to a family he doesn't know, and miss five days of school.


Why do they make things so complicated? And they wonder why these kids have so many issues.

Allowing him to stay at home with someone he knows and trusts, and to attend school seems like the logical thing to do, but not in the foster care world.

Lets ship him off to a foster home that is two hours from home, where we don't know the people, and the family doesn't know him. As far as the state goes they could care less if he misses five days of school.

There answer Mrs. Sanford rest assured all of our foster parents have had background checks, and are trained just as you and your husband were.



  1. That is absolutely ridiculous. There is no reason that the state couldn't give them a copy or even just give you written confirmation that your MIL has been approved!! And as far as their answer - it has nothing to do with whether or not the respite person is trained! It has to do with Lil Man being removed from his familiar surroundings, routines, and people he knows and trusts!

    I know, I'm preaching to the choir. Couldn't he go to the respite provider that you've used before? At least then he'd be familiar with them?

    UGH - that just sucks. :(

  2. Nice! So ridiculous, but that's the system that I hate at work! Love the kids, but not liking so much of the system! Plus, some of those trained foster homes, yucky around here! I wouldn't let my kids go there if THEY paid ME for watching my children!

  3. Doesn't it seem that sometime the system is as abusive and neglectful as what caused the kid to come into care in the first place.

  4. It totally sucks. The previous foster family that did respite, now has a placement. Due to Lil' mans speciality status he can be the only foster child in the home. Which leaves us with very few options when it comes to respite.

    DFACS worker emailed me back after I sent her a not so nice email, and said she will check with her supervisor.

    Our agency will not take a written letter, the need the background check in order to cover themselves.

    I told DFACS I will pay them the $$ for the background check.. DRAMA!

  5. Praying that things get worked out and Lil' Man can stay at home with your MIL and in his own routine...You may want to talk to the supervisor yourself! :)

  6. Oh gosh. I can't believe this!!!! AGH!!!

  7. that sucks, I hope they see the light and do what is in the best intrest of the child... i can hope right

  8. This is the shit that makes me come unglued. I would go above your caseworker and demand a copy of the back ground check. MAKE someone listen to you! You know what is best for lil'man and when you agreed to become a foster parent you agreed to advocate for his best interest. This would NOT be benificial for him, especially given his better behavior. UGH, I swear this makes me sooooo MAD! Hang in there. Be strong and MAKE them listen!!!