Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Oh my

It has been storming on and off since Friday, and it doesn't seem like we're gonna get a break any time soon.  Normally I welcome the rain, we're usually in a drought by summer.  However when half of your roof is covered with a tarp it tends to cause problems.  It is currently raining in my bathroom..  You know the bathroom that cost us $10,000 to build last year..

The insurance adjuster was out today, and said they would pay for a new roof, a paint job, cornice board, as well as insulation. After tonight's storm he might need to come back out and reassess the damage.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Toot Toot

 

Looks like we're coming to Scotland somewhere near the middle or end of August!!

Do us all a favor..

 

What in the hell is wrong with people in this world?  There has been so many shootings in the news lately.   There was the man who killed 10 people (including his own Mother), in Alabama  Then the teenager who killed 12 people at his high school.  The nut job brother who killed two of his sisters this passed Saturday.  And now the crazy nursing home killer

If your having a bad day, and you feel like killing someone  please do us all a favor, and just shoot yourself.  There is no need to go about killing innocent little children, old people in a nursing home, and your own Mother? 

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Bloody hell!

 

If it isnt one thing its another..  Saturday morning we woke up to a water logged wall in our bathroom.  Upon inspection we discovered that the lovely little storm that blew through our town took 1/4 of our roofing shingles with it.  WTF?  Our roof is less than 3 yrs old. 

Wayne spent a good portion of the morning tacking down shingles, and placing a tarp over our roof.  The insurance adjuster should be out sometime this week to inspect the damage. 

Can't a girl get a break?

The single life

 

After our weekend long respite I am rethinking this whole parenting thing.  Maybe we aren't cut out to be parents.  Maybe we've enjoyed the single life a little too much.  We both love children, and enjoy being around them. After all we are the most popular Aunt and Uncle in the family.  But at the end of the day we enjoy our quiet time, and our time together.

Going from no children to one child is a huge adjustment. Add in the fact that most foster children have been neglected or abused in some manner it makes things a little nuts!

On Saturday we took the girls shopping, they each picked out an outfit and Pj's, we went to dinner, and then to a fun house for a few hours.  It seemed whatever we did was not enough.  Can we get a ice cream, can I get my nails done, can we do this or that.

I understand that's probably how life has been for them..Get what you can when you can, because you don’t know where your next meal is coming from let alone your next outfit.  It just breaks my heart. 

They don't know how to interact, they don't know how to play they just know how to survive.  It's heart breaking.

When it was time to take them back to their foster home, both girls said that they didn't want to go.  They wanted to stay  here with us.  As soon as we met up with their foster Mother little bit shouted "can we go to their house again."

I think doing respite as our fist placement might have been a bad idea.  It is such a hard adjustment for only a short period of time.

Until next time..

Friday, March 27, 2009

Welcome too..

 

Motherhood!  I was up half the night with Little bit (my nickname for our youngest FK).  She was crying on and off of ear pain, and was running a slight fever. After a few hours of on and off crying, she finally went to sleep!

When she woke this morning she was in a much better mood, and told me that her ear was no longer hurting.  About an hour after being up she was exhausted, and wanted to sleep.  She was tugging at her ear.  Within 20 minutes her fever had shot up again.

I called our worker to inform her of what was going on, and to ask for her insurance information.  I called the urgent care, only to find out they do not accept Medicaid.  My only choice was to sit in the ER.

Four hours later she was diagnosed with a severe ear infection, and bronchitis.  They doped her up with medication, and flipped a switch from within.  She was bouncing off the walls!!

Poor thing has been on and off all day.  Hopefully she will be feeling better by tomorrow as we have a few surprises in store!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Heart Broken

 

We picked up our respite children a few hours ago.  They were full of questions.  What did our house look like.  Did we have a bathroom?  What kind of food did we have? What were our cats names? Do we have our own children.  Do we have a TV? 

The oldest girl plays the Mother roll doing things for her little sister that a Mother would do.  She has a hard time letting go and just being a child.

The little one loves our house, and is ready to move in!!  She was so excited about "her bedroom", and about the cats.

I cannot imagine being in their shoes.  They no nothing about myself of Wayne.  They are sleeping in strange house with strange people, and really have no clue about where they belong. 

I gave them each a stuff animal to sleep with, and hugged them both good night.  I reassured them that I was in the room next door should they need anything in the middle of the night.

I hope they feel safe, and know that no harm will come to them while they are in our care.

Today's the day!

 

Today is the day we get the girls, I am excited but a little nervous as the same time.  There isnt much  I can't handle, but I am scared of the unknown.  There are so many rules, and regulations that must be followed.  Their every move is charted, their injuries must be recorded, as well as any medication.

Phone calls must be monitored, and they can't be out of my sight.

Check back later, to see how we survive our fist night as respite foster parents!

The months

 

My Mum's birthday is approaching fast.  I can already feel my anxiety level going up.  I don't like living my life around birthdays and death days.  I am tired of dreading the next month, because of what it represents .

January 8th is Teagyn's angel day. It is also my niece Katie's birthday.

April is my Mum's birthday

June is when my Dad died.

October is Teagyn's birthday, and also the month my mum was the most sick.

November, is my Dad's birthday, and also the month my Mum died.

December sucks,  because half my family is missing.

Then their's Mothers day, Fathers day, the first day of school, and all the other things in between.

I know it isnt healthy to live your life in such a way.  But what am I supposed to do?  Act as if they never lived?

How do you celebrate the life of your loved ones who have passed on, while honoring their memory and allowing yourself some time to grieve?

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Out of the mouths of babies..

 

Yesterday I was helping Parker build a house out of Lincoln logs.  We were both impressed with our handy work, and decided to add a "wing" onto our house.  As I was getting the base ready

Parker said "Karen your blazing hot"

Parker: "Your on fire"

I touched myself with my finger and made a sizzling sound.

Parker says "Karen your not really on fire, it just means your cool"

I couldn't stop laughing!!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Respite

 

We are providing respite this week from Thursday until Sunday for two girls age 5 yrs, and 10 yrs old.  We are excited about having some little people in the house, and are open to the challenge.  These girls have only been in care for less than a month, so I am sure they are going to have some "issues"  with respite.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Need your votes!!

My niece Jannae is trying to win a year of free Icee's! lol

Please go to www.Ritas.com

Click on Mystery flavor link, in the bottom right hand corner.

Type in Jannaes Jamin Berry

Cast you vote as many times I you like!

Saturday, March 21, 2009

up shits creek.

 

anyone got a paddle?  I think I might be in over my head a little here.  I've been reading up on breast cancer, just trying to understand it all.  Trying to figure out how within a year my Mum was diagnosed, and died because of some stupid cancer cells.

I have been reading up on the risk factors. 

I am scared, I don't want cancer.  I don't want my sisters to cancer either.  I am really freaking out

Risk factor

*Gender-  I am a women

age-thankfully still young

Genetic factor-still waiting to find out of my Mum had genetic testing

*Family history--since I have a first relative with cancer this doubles my chances of developing it.

*race-White women are slightly more likely to develop breast cancer.

*starting your menstrual cycle early- before age 13

*not having children before 30 (At this rate that's gonna be me)

*Being over weight

The only thing on the above list that fit my Mum were the age, race, and gender.  She is the first person and hopefully the last to be diagnosed with breast cancer.

The above risk factors with a * are the ones that I fit into.

I need to get off google, and stay away from the computer.

I am turning into some hypochondriac blogging nut. 

All in a days work.

 

Today I have been slowly playing catch up. ,

I haven't vacuumed my house in over a week, there is cat hair everywhere. 

Some how the laundry basket is over flowing.

The dishes are piled high

The trash cans are over flowing

and the litter box is stinky.

I vacuumed the living rung while sitting on the couch, as I don't have enough energy to stand up and do it.

Three loads of laundry down two more to go.

I am leaving the trash, dishes, and litter box for Wayne!

The bills need to be paid, the milk has expired, and the washing machine is on its last legs.

The grass needs cut, the mail needs to be checked, and I need to clean out my stinky car.

My house is falling apart.

Sicko

 

I think this is the longest time in my blog history that I have went without blogging. Does that tell you something?

I caught the nasty flu bug from my loving husband.  I have been down and pretty much OUT since Monday.  Unable to lift my head off of my pillow. 

I feel like such a wimp.

My temperature has ranged from 103.6, to 95.4.  So I am either blazing hot, and sweaty, or frozen solid.

I have had cold sweats, hot sweats, body aches, sinus congestion, body pain, sore ears, sore teeth (WTF?) and a big old massive headache.

I can stay awake for an hour max, before my body gives in.

Since my amazing handsome husband is feeling better, I have been keeping him on his toes.  It's good to milk it every now and then.

I am much better at taking care of sick people. Hopefully I will be back to myself by Monday.  I dont like being a wimp.sick

Monday, March 16, 2009

Sick

 

My poor hubby has been knocked out in bed since Friday.  He has had a fever of 103 on, and off since Saturday morning.  Congested, coughing, aches, and chills are just a few of symptoms.

Today around noon, I spiked a fever.  I came home at 4pm, and went for nap.  I woke an hour later, and thankfully feel better. 

I am guessing Wayne has the flu.  Lets hope its over with soon.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Feeling sorry

 

This weekend I attended my future sister in law's bridal shower. I had a great time, and even one a few prizes.  The wedding dress  made of of toilet paper that I was modeling one first prize!

I was hesitant to attend, because family get together's only remind me of what I have lost.  Between the two of them they have eight Parents.  Both of their biological parents divorced, and remarried. Which means  each of them has a Mother, a Father, a Step Mother, and a Step Father. 

Not to mention the ton of grandparents, Aunts, uncles and cousins.

How lucky are they?

Both of my parents are somewhere up above.

I  have a step Father out there somewhere that I have spoken to a handful of times in the last and a half.

My two sisters and there "lovelies" are in Virginia

My brother, and his family reside in Scotland, with the rest of my extended family. 

We don't see my in laws often, but when we do we have a great time.

I often reflect back on my childhood.  Easter scavenger hunts, Christmas parties surrounded by parents, grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles.  Birthday parties galore.  Weekend pick nicks, and family vacations.

Then I think into the future, and worry about my unborn children.  What will they think when they reflect upon their childhood? There will be no huge Christmas parties, no sleepovers at grandma's. No "spoiled by grandpa".

I am happy for the times I shared with my loved ones, but saddened by all they will miss out on.

Foster care blog

 

I have created a separate blog regarding foster care.  My hope is by sharing our foster care journey  with the public that someone else, might open their home to a child in need.

Please stop on by our new blog A Family for Keeps, and leave a comment!

I will still continue to update our currently blog for our friends and family, as away to keep in touch.

A family for keeps

Placement

 

Wayne and I have had our foster care license since December of 2008.  We have had a few phone calls which in the end did not pan out.  Our latest phone call for was a three month old baby boy, who was born with a heart condition which required him to be g-tube fed, and breath via  tracheotomy

Below a copy of a post I wrote reading the baby

So it looks like we wont baby, despite the fact that we are more than willing, and able to care for him.  He is from a county six hours away from us.  They are trying to place him closer to accommodate visits with his birth Mother.

So the baby will stay in the hospital where he has been since birth. Unless they find someone in their county or come to their sense, and place him with us.

So his monthly visit with his birth Mom is worth leaving him alone in a hospital without a family. I am all for reunification, with the birth family, but at what cost?

I should have known better, I shouldn't have gotten so excited.

How is it that everyone else I know has 2-3 placements, and I cant even get a little one?  I am not asking for much. I mean this baby has a g-tube, a tracheostomy, and a heart condition.

Maybe I am putting too many emotions into this whole foster care thing, but its upsetting when we get a call.  They give you all this information.  You paint a picture of this little person in your head.  You open up your home,  you get excited, you make a mental list of everything you need

All for nothing..

Foster teens

 

 

University of Phoenix & NFPA - Partners in Education
The University of Phoenix has offered 50 scholarships to foster youth under the banner of the University's First Chance Scholarship program. 
There are only a few of the scholarships still available.
Don't miss out on reaching your educational goals, apply for one of these final scholarships 
TODAY!!!

Read more about the scholarship and download the application to take advantage of this opportunity by
CLICKING HERE.

http://nfpaonline.org/content/?page=HOMEPAGE

Our foster care room

 

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We have one crib in the room just now which turns into a toddler bed. We have another in the attic incase we get two young children. I love the bedding set!

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The child's dresser, and mirror

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A shelf to store keep sakes, and a night light below.

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There is a table, and chair set for crafting, a big chair for reading books, or snuggling!

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From the door way, you can see the crib, chalk board, table and chair set, and a few toys.

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From the reading chair, you can see all of the toys.  A little over the top I know. 

Now we just need some wall decor, and a child!!

Foster care

 

I have decided to start a foster care blog separate from our family blog.  My hope is that someone out there maybe inspired by our journey into foster care, and decided to foster themselves.

My husband, and I had only been married two months, when we decided to look into becoming foster parents.  Fostering is something I have wanted to do since I was a little girl.  It took my husband some time to warm up to the idea. 

Below a post from out family blog written in Aug, of 2008.

 

Wayne, and I have decided to pursue becoming foster parents through a local private foster agency called Georgia safe. It is a long process, and it will most likely be 3-6 months before we receive a child.

We have decided to care for a child between the ages of 0-4 yrs old, who may or may not have mild developmental disabilities. We also stated that we would be willing to take a sibling group of two children if they are both under the age of 4.

So far we have filled out over thirty pages of paper work, submitted copies of every important ID, or paper pertaining to our life. Got a few things notarized, full medical physicals, and mailed everything to the agency.

Next weekend we will travel to Albany, GA. Which is just over an hour from Thomasville, to begin our IMPACT training. ( Initial Interest, Mutual Selection, Pre-Service Training, Assessment, Continuing Development, Teamwork)

After our weekend long training session we will submit finger prints so that the agency can run a background check,

Once our background checks come back clear (Wayne you better not have any hidden secretes!!), we will begin the home study process. I have heard that the home study is the hardest part of the process.

They tour your house, and asked details of your entire life. Questions about your parents, how you were raised, your views of discipline, why you want to be a foster parent etc.

Once the home study is complete all of our info is then submitted before a review board, and we are either approved or dined.

There are so many loving children who need a good home, someone to love them, someone to care about them. Someone to show them that they are important.

Can you imagine being five years old and diagnosed with cancer, not receiving the right treatments, because your parents are too high on drugs to notice.

Can you imagine being a baby born to a mother who has no place to live, no food to give you.

Can you imagine being a teenager fending for yourself because your parents are alcoholics, and spend all of the money on alcohol.

Can you imagine living without power,food, clothes, and shelter. That is some of the challenges these poor children are faced with

While I know we can't save the world, it feels good to know we can make a small difference.

I will keep you updated as we venture further into our foster care journey.

We received our license on December 5, 2008.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Happy Birthday Jaxon

 

 

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A two year old is so many things.
A tiny discoverer of butterfly wings.
A hugger of teddies, a sweet sleepy head.
And someone to dream for in bright years ahead.
A special new person who right from the start,
has a place in the family and a coarse in your heart.
And just when you think you've learned all the things,
that your dear son is,and the joy that he brings,
a hug or a grin comes with such a sweet surprise,
that love finds you smiling with tears in your eyes

Friday, March 13, 2009

NOPE

 

We got final word today that we will not be getting the baby.  Which is a little upsetting, to say the least.  This is the second time we have been considered for a placement of a medically fragile child.  Only to be told know because of the distance.

You can't let on to the agency that you are the slightest bit upset, because foster parents are supposed to be super human.  If you let on that you are upset (or in my case cried), then you wont get a placement, because you will be considered emotionally  unstable.

I know it isnt our agencies ..They want/need the placements in order to stay in business.

If one more person says it "oh that just means there are no children being neglected that need care".  I am gonna SCREAM that's BS.  I know, you know, we all know there are plenty of kids out there being neglected, sick children alone in hospitals with no one to care for them.  Because of all the red tape.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Shit luck

 

So it looks like we wont get the baby, despite the fact that we are more than willing, and able to care for him.  He is from a county six hours away from us.  They are trying to place him closer to accommodate visits with his birth Mother.

So the baby will stay in the hospital where he has been since birth. Unless they find someone in their county or come to their sense, and place him with us.

So his monthly visit with his birth Mom is worth leaving him alone in a hospital without a family. I am all for reunification, with the birth family, but at what cost?

I should have known better, I shouldn't have gotten so excited.

How is it that everyone else I know has 2-3 placements, and I cant even get a little one?  I am not asking for much. I mean this baby has a g-tube, a tracheostomy, and a heart condition.

Maybe I am putting too many emotions into this whole foster care thing, but its upsetting when we get a call.  They give you all this information.  You paint a picture of this little person in your head.  You open up your home,  you get excited, you make a mental list of everything you need

All for nothing..

Oh baby!

 

Yesterday at the close of business we got a call for a 3 month old baby boy with some medical problems.  He has been approved for in home nursing while we are at work.  I will find out today if everything goes through.  Keep your fingers crossed!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

For the locals..

.

Thomasville Toddlers

Thomasville Toddlers is a play group that meets weekly at different locations around Thomasville. Members of the group are local parents/caregiver with children between the age of birth-5 yrs.  for more info please visit the group’s website at:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ThomasvilleToddlers/

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Why?

 

Last week Wayne, and I went to visit a family friend in the hospital.  He had double pneumonia and required oxygen.  Stepping foot into his room, brought back so many of the memories of my Mum.  He was thin, and was having trouble forming sentences while catching his breath.

Visions of my Mum flashed in my head. 

It all happened so quickly.

In Oct 2006 she was diagnosed with stage one breast cancer.

In December 06  she had a mastectomy, and started chemo.

In May 07 she was finished with her treatment, and her cancer was in remission.

Cancer was a thing of the passed, my Mum had beat it.  It was "only stage one" Which has a 98%-100% survival rate.

In September 07 she was in Scotland, having a grand time.  Half way into her trip she developed a nagging cough. When she returned home she went to the doctor, who diagnosed her with pneumonia. 

For weeks the doctors pumped our mum full of antibiotics  trying to rid of her the pneumonia that we assume she had caught on the flight.

September turned into October, and the cough was still hanging around.  Mum was becoming tired,

One night in Oct, 2007 Mum couldn't breath, Jeff (my step dad), took her to the hospital.  She was treated for pneumonia, as well as a collapsed lung.

Test after test, we were told she had pneumonia, a collapsed lung, and a Pleural effusion.  So much time was wasted, before we found out the real issue.  The cancer had returned.  It had metastasized to our Mothers lungs causing her lungs to collapse, fluid to build up, and in the end, taking her life.

What went wrong?

How can something with a 98%-100% cure rate, take someone's live in a matter of weeks.  Once it was rediscovered , she had no chance,no chance at all of beating the cancer. Too much time had been wasted.

Why was she given the all clear in May?

and then again in August?

THE CANCER WASNT GONE.

Why did they say it was pneumonia?

Why didnt they do more tests?

Why didnt they treat her sooner?

Why did she have to suffer?

Why did we have to watch her suffer?

Why did she have to die?

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Hold your horses..

 

We still have not gotten a placement, however we have had a few phone calls.  All of them have been for teens, the last call for was a 16 yr old male. We considered fostering him, but in the end decided not to.

Our agency didn't seem happy with our answer, and I had to explain myself to the intake coordinator, as well as the director.  Bottom line is we signed up to foster non-school aged children.  We have no experience in parenting a teen, and don't want to get in over our heads with our first placement. Maybe down the road once we get to know the system a little better.

We made it known from the beginning that we wished to foster non-school aged children.  I was assure time, and time again that our agency placed children of all ages.  Come to find out they mostly place children 8, and above.

We have been working with this agency since June of 2008.  We have had our license since December of 2008.  I feel like we have wasted a lot of time.

We are considering switching to another agency, but in order to do so we must resign from our current agency.  For some reason I am having a hard time forming a letter to mail to them, because I feel like I owe them something.

Granted we spent a lot of time, and money on getting our license, but they also worked hard to ensure that our home was licensed in a timely manner. 

The agency we are considering switching too only places medically fragile children. They are in the process of changing their licensed, but should be ready to start placing children, July 1st.  Which would give us enough time to go thru all the shitty lovely paper work once again.

In hindsight we should have done our research a little better. 

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Little buggers

 

Posted on the fridge
Dear Cats:

The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.


The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.


I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, however.

Cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

 

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered.

Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -
feline attendance is not required.


The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other  cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.


Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:

TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:


(1) They live here. You don't.

(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.

(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

Remember,cats are better than kids because they

(1) eat less,

(2) don't ask for money all the time,

(3) are easier to train,

(4) normally come when called,

(5) never ask to drive the car,

(6) don't hang out with drug-using people;

(7) don't smoke or drink,

(8) don't want to wear your clothes,

(9) don't have to buy the latest fashions,

(10) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and

(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children