Thumbs up

Lil' Man did great at his school program.  He came in shouting "Hey Mom give me a hug."  He then climbed onto the bleachers and spotted a rose.  He looked at me, and pointed to the rose. I shook my head no because I knew he wanted to pick it.  That boy loves to give his Mama flowers.

He sat nicely while the principle was talking.  He tired his best to get from sitting to standing for the pledge, but ended up toppling over.  His aid had to come to his rescue because he couldn't get back up. 

The music started and so did his lil foot.   He was tapping away, and looking around in his own little world.  He didnt sing half of the songs.  When he decided to sing there was a five second delay between him and the other students.  But I didnt care, I was proud of him.

He stayed in the one spot, didnt shout, kick, push etc.  I will admit it is hard to see him next to his typical classmates.  His social, emotional, and educational delays are so apparent.  I love that Lil kid.

FAB!

Things have been FAB here on the home front.  Lil' Man has had a good week.  We've been spending a lot of time outside in the evening riding bikes.

Tomorrow morning he is participating in the spring program at school.  I am so nervous.  I told the hubby I am gonna crawl under the table and hide if he starts acting up while on stage lol.

Hubby said "don't worry what's the worst thing he could do?" "throw poop?"

Keep your fingers crossed! 

Tired

Lil' Man sleeps about 11.5 hours a night.  Typically he is bed at 7:30pm, and I wake him for school at 7am, if he hasn't already woken on his own. He takes an hour nap in the afternoon, but is often ready for his nap around 10am.

He has been taking the same medications for several months now.

It seems the tiredness is getting worse.

For example Saturday night he was asleep by 7:45pm, and slept until 8am Sunday.  By 10am he was fussy (whining, rubbing his eyes, yawning.) By 11am he was sound asleep in the car.  Despite the fact the music was on, and P and Willie-B where chatting.

The crabbiness is something you would expect from a 2 yr old who missed his nap, not a 5 yr old.

I've asked for a sleep study and was told there was no reason for one.  Besides I doubt he would even sleep during one.

After getting 11.5 hours of sleep last night, he fell asleep in school during circle time. 

I am at a loss.  I really don't think its medication related

On the go

Its been a busy week!

My bosses are out of town so we've had P and Willie-B since Thursday.

Thursday we went to the rose bud parade.

Friday we went to the "big" parade.  We bumped into Lil' Mans bio's.  We chatted few while Lil' Man spazzed out. (gotta love small town living)

Saturday we ventured to an Art and Science Museum about an hour away. They had an awesome dinosaur exhibit.  Lil' Man, and Willie-B where scared. They thought they were real.  We had a good time and ended up getting a membership.

After the museum we headed home, and went for a golf cart ride around the plantation.  We spotted some dear, an armadillo, and a few gator's.

After the golf cart ride we went to dinner at Ruby Tuesday's. The boys where great, so well behaved.

All three boys where in bed my 7:30pm, and slept until 8am!

Today we played hide and seek, before heading to the aquarium.   After the aquarium we went to the Park, and then ran to Target to get Lil' Man a swim shirt.

When we got home the boys played, did a few crafts, and played play dough, while dinner was cooking.

We just finished up baths, and they are watching a few minutes of TV before bed.  I love it when the kids are worn out!

12 months?

Just realized today marks one year since we began fostering Lil' Man.  What a wild, crazy fun filled, learning experience year it has been.  Who knew?

This was taken last year, "my boys" riding the horses after being good in the store.. ha ha

Parade (update)

I spoke with the school and was told that only select students where picked from each preschool class to participate in the parade.  I was assured  that Lil' Man was not singled out. 

I am waiting on my fav person at the school who gives me the inside scoop to confirm this. To me it looked as if his entire class was in the float but I cant confirm if it was half his class half the other class, because I don’t know all of the students well enough.

The school has called me twice today, and i've been up there once because Lil' Mans behaviors are out of control.  I wish I could get inside of that kids head.

On a good note, I am meeting with a new daycare on Monday. Their program sounds great! .  The program,  provides structured educational enrichment through the 100-Book Challenge Curriculum, homework tutoring  Once their homework is completed, the children participate in curriculum enrichment activities centered around our subjects of interest -gardening, computer training; drama, crafts, career building skills. In addition the children are provided with meals and/or snacks, depending on the length of their day with us.

Just crossing my fingers they will accept my guy, because they don't have too.

Another blow..

This afternoon when I went to pick Lil' Man up from daycare the director took me into her office (nothing new).  She then informed me that they will no longer be able to care for Lil' Man due to his behaviors.  I have until school gets out (middle of May) to find some place else. 

I bawled like a baby.

After dinner we ventured down town, to watch the rose bud parade.  Up comes Lil' man's school.  Much to my shock his entire class was sitting on the float alongside his teachers, and the principle.

I check his folder every night as soon as I pick him up from daycare.  There was NOTHING in his folder about a parade.  Infact hubby was in his class today visiting, and no one said a thing.

I understand Lil' Man has major issues, but at the end of the day it isnt his fault.  He didnt ask to be born let along born to a Mother that drank.  I wish people would take a step back and take his little heart into consideration.  He is a person too.

official word

We received official word from the adoptive parents worker, that they are indeed not adopting Lil' Man.  They stated that they seen some violent behaviors that concerned them.  The adoptive Mom was also sure that the FAS diagnosis was gonna stick (no shit)

Hello where you listening when I was talking to you? Did you read the reports? Did you think I was making the stuff up to make Lil' Man look bad? No I was being honest.  I wanted you to have all the information so that you could make an informed decision.

Thankfully I was told that their agency has put a hold on them receiving referrals because they where that set on adopting Lil' Man.  Them changing their mind came out of no where.

I am angry, and wish I could speak with the adoptive mom.

Lil' Man was not upset when we told him last night. I think he already knew, bc we have had acting out over the last few weeks.

He said thats okay because you and The hubby are my forever family. (heart breaking)

much better

Yesterday, and today where much better days.  Hubby spent the entire weekend working on his final project for school this semester.  Lil' Man and I built a tent, set up his train tracks, crafted, played outside, went for a big ride, and bake some yummy treats.

Nothing but positive reports from school today! After school we went to the park with a bunch of my friends and their children.  Lil' Man played well!! He  only tired to beat someone up once. After dinner he rode his big until the training wheel feel off LOL

I hope we can have a small level of normal for a few weeks.  Just so I can get rid of this migraine!

Broken

Yesterday was a hellish day. I had the worst migraine known to man, and Lil' Man was off the hook.  I swear Lil' Man is bi-polar, but what do I know? I only live with him on a daily basis.

He was irritable, hyper,  raging, demanding, defiant,yelling  laughing out of control, trying to eat non-stop, bouncing from one subject to another. He literally drove me nuts.

I came unglued. I told the hubby I have had enough, that we were no longer going to foster.  There was no reason to live with this much freaken stress. I was ready to call his worker.

I wish there was an end in sight.  I am no longer happy parenting this child.   I wish there was a  responsible family that we could use for respite. I need a break, because I am at my breaking point.

vent over.

Today's better.

FAS-update

On Tuesday we drove to Atlanta because Lil' Man had a doctors appointment early Wednesday at the Marcus Autism center.  They have a Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and Drug Exposure Center.  This is the center where Lil' Man received his original diagnosis of partial fetal alcohol syndrome.

We arrived at 8:30am, and left just before 3pm.  Why on Earth would a clinic that deals with FAS kids on a regular basis make an appointment last hours. It was hard for the kid to keep it together.

The appointment stated off with the Neurodevelopmental Psychologist. She took Lil' Man alone to be tested (which I hard warned would not work).  She lasted 20 minutes before coming to get me for help (ha ha). The testing lasted for over two hours. 

At one point she told him to "try try try" as it was clear he had given up.  He looked at the psychologist, and said "I am trying stupid." It took all I had not to bust out laughing.  (Great Mother aren't I?)

While I was in the room with Lil' Man and the Psychologist, the Hubby met with a social worker.  Hubby said she asked a few questions and that was it.

Once the psychologist was done testing Lil' Man I took him to the waiting room, and it was my turn to be grilled by the psychologist.  I must have answered at least 500 questions off her her damn sheet of paper.  I better get some good results.

We also met with a special educator, we talked about Lil' Mans school experiences, and what type of support he receives. She is going to come up with suggestions of other things we can do to support him in the classroom.

We then took a short break for lunch, before meeting with the geneticist.  He was a very caring man, and remembered seeing Lil' Man last year. He did a complete physical before  going over what FAS markers that Lil' man has.  Last year he had 14 markers, this year only 11.  Between 10-15 is considered partial FAS.

In the end he recommended that Lil' Man remain in our home.  That we consider reducing his medication, and that we meet with a psychiatrist, that  only sees children with FAS. Only problem with that is that the guy he recommended is 3.5 hours away.

We will have all of the results back mid May.  I was proud of how Lil' Man held it together during the 2+ hours of testing.  I was surprised that he didnt know some of the answers. All in all it was a good appointment, but I didnt learn anything I didnt already know.  I will am curious to get the test results

too much

I have a migraine and the kid has been whining since he opened is eyes this morning.  Nothing will please him, I am so very frustrated.  Lots to blog about but my head hurts too much.  Check back later for an update.

My turn now

No news from the adoptive family.  I sent an email to them on Friday, and another one last night.  I really hope everything is okay.  A phone call or an email would be nice.  We are assuming that they do not plan to adopt him.  On Thursday I am taking him to have his pictures taken, and is profile will be placed  on online adoption web sites.   I imagine it would say something like

Lil' Man born 2/05 is a bright, and loveable little boy with big blue eyes.  Lil' Man enjoys playing with cars, doing puzzles, and playing outside. Academically he is slightly below his peers. Diagnosed with partial fetal alcohol syndrome  his behavior often hinders his progress. Lil' man has an IEP, and also receives speech, and OT.  Lil' Man takes daily medication, and attends weekly  therapy.  He has grown leaps and bounds in the passed year.

Lil' Man needs a strong, dedicated and attentive family who can  model positive behaviors in a stable, well-structured and loving environment. Lil' Man would benefit from being the youngest child in the home until he adjusts to his new family.

Anyone want to adopt a sweet blue eyed boy?

poop

Today was a shitty day.  Lil' Man got sent home sick from school today.  His tummy has been upset on and off since Thursday. He was acting fine yesterday, so I assumed he was alright. I called my boss and let her know that I had to pick him up from school.  I told her she could either come home (remember i'm a nanny), or that I could pick Lil' Man and continue on with my work day. 

Since I was off for the last nine days she was not too happy.  In the end I picked him up, and stayed at work.  At nap time he got up, and had an poop accident on the floor.  Instead of coming to tell me he tried to clean it up himself. 

I was down stairs folding laundry and didnt hear a thing (their house is huge).  I heard a noise and went to see what was going on.

I entered the guest room where Lil' man as napping.  The bathroom light was on.  No biggy.. I walked toward the bathroom, and the light went off. Out came Lil' Man pantless.

I opened the door, and turned the light back on.

OMG was all I could say.

There was poop everywhere.  My worst nightmare come true. Nothing like poop hand prints on your bosses custom wallpaper. On the sink, all over the floor, all over the kid. Wads and wads of toilet all over the floor.

It was EVERYWHERE.

I was fuming, but felt bad at the same time, because I knew he was trying to clean up his mess.

I had to walk out the room, and sit down for a second. There was THAT much poop. I came up with a plan.  I stuck the kid in the tub, and got to scrubbing.

I was able to get it all cleaned up, and aired out the room. 

What a shitty day.

It's a girl!

We will be welcoming  another little girl into the family in mid Aug.  My sister Nicola is expecting her third child. A sweet baby girl possibly named Ava.

My nieces and nephews light up my world. I enjoy visiting them, chatting to them on the phone and keeping up with their day to day lives via pictures on facebook.  So here is Ava's very first blog picture.

I was privilege enough to witness the birth of my niece Teagyn, and hope to be around for Miss Ava's birth too!

I can't wait to meet you little one.

Back at it

Back to the grind tomorrow.  After being off for school/work for the last nine days its gonna be hard to get back into the swing on things.  Lil' Man has not been feeling well. I hope he's better by tomorrow. 

A the firefighter!

We had a fun spring break!  My sister Lesley, and her two children J (9), and A (4) where in town for a week.  We were on the go constantly.  Lil' Man did well being off schedule. 

We went to a hands on children's museum. Here is Lil' Man working at Winn Dixie.

We went to the beach, had a few BBQ's, went to the aquarium, to a bounce house, shopping, to the Animal shelter (to feed the cats and dogs treats), and a million and one golf cart rides. Good times! I was sad to  see  them go.

J shopping at Little Winn Dixie.

An answer

Lil' Mans case worker did not have a conference call with the adoptive family yesterday. When she called their worker today to find out what happened, she got her voice mail.  Her VM stated she is out on vacation starting today and will return on April 19th.  WTF? I swear I wouldn't believe half this shit if I wasn't living it.  This is a child we are talking about, not a freaking puppy from the pet store.

Lil' Mans case worker called the adoptive family, and left them another message.  I sent them an email tonight.  I played dumb and just said I was checking in to see how they are doing since I haven't heard from them.  I also asked if they planned to attended Lil' Mans Apt. next week.

If they changed their mind, i'll be pissed. They just need  let us know so we can look else where and stop wasting our time.

I hate this freaking roller coaster  ride.  Its insane.

Nada

Surprise surprise I didnt hear from Lil' Man's caseworks today.  So I still have no idea what's going on.  I left her several voice mails, and sent her an email.  Hopefully we will find out something tomorrow.

Today's the day

I feel physically sick.  Lil' Man's case worker is having a phone conference with the adoptive parents, and their case worker at some point today.  I don't have a good feeling about the adoption.  If they do plan to adopt why haven't they called their Son in 11 days? If they don't plan to adopt why have they let it drag out this long?

On a side note next Wednesday we are taking Lil' Man to the FAS clinic for his one year check up. Can anyone think of anything I should ask? I've got a few questions already.

Mum

My Mum as pretty as ever during her chemo.

Another birthday passes

Happy Birthday Mum

Another birthday is passing by without you near.  Its hard to understand why.   Please know that not a day goes by that I do not think of you, or speak your name. 

You are one in a million.

Happy Birthday Mum.  It's sure to be the best one yet, Though you left me here.  Did you Think I'd forget?

Your cake this year, will surely be, a beauty to see. Wish the icing made of Silver and the candles made of gold.

Yes your birthday in Heaven is a grad affair. And I know you'll look so lovely with a halo in your hair.

The angels will come from everywhere to sign your birthday song. And I know they'll be so happy that you've joined them In God's happy home.

No I can't send you a card of a gift this year. So I"ll just spend a special prayer, to that wonderful Mum of mine way up there.

Happy Birthday Mum

Lots of love

Karen

Give up

Haven't heard from the adoptive parents in nine days. I've given up hope that they are going to adopt, but maybe I will be surprised.  Lil' Man hasn't mentioned them, and I don't plan to say anything until I find out what the hell is going on.

Whirlwind

The last few days have been a whirlwind. 

On Wednesday Lil' Man, and  I drove to Jacksonville, FL to pick up my sister, and her two children. After getting everyone in the car, we headed for lunch.  We then spent a few hours at a local children's museum for a few hours. Followed by a spur of the moment trip to the beach.

Thursday was spent running here, there and everywhere.

• Story time
• Dry cleaners
• Bank
• Lunch at Chick Fil A
• Nap time
• Golf cart ride
• Bike ride
• And a few other stops along the way.

Friday morning, we went to Parkers school for field day.  Follow by a quick run to Wal-Mart for BBQ supplies.  Then home for a quick nap, before meeting my SIL, and her children for another golf cart ride.  I got off work at 5pm, and we headed home to clean before our guest arrived.  We cooked entirely too much food.  The kids had a blast playing outside until way past bedtime.

Saturday we headed North to the aquarium with a picnic in tow. Then my sister and I went shopping.  Before heading home we went out for dinner. When we got home the kids headed back outside, and stayed  out passed dark yet again.

Lil' Man has been doing well off scheduled. 

Today we woke up to find that the Easter bunny had left us a scavenger hunt.  It didnt take long for the kids to find their Easter baskets which where hiding in the tub! After chillin for a little while we decided to go geocahing. We went to four hunts, and were able to find two cashes. I had hoped for a nap afterwards, but no such luck. We spent the rest of the day outside.

My house looks like a hurricane passed through, but everyone is fed, and happy, and we're having fun!

That's all that matters. 

Oops

What a week it has been..Yawn... Lil' Man's aid has been out sick all week.  Which means that the kid has been out of control.  Running out of the class, hitting, kicking, spitting.  Here I thought the new classroom was better.

Nope

It's the aid.

She's got his number, and knows how to control him.

I just don't  understand why other people are not able to control him. He's only five

Since he has been out of control at school, the behavior continues at home. Which hasn't been easy because my sister, and her two children are here for spring break.