Wednesday, June 30, 2010

emotions all over

What an emotional day.

The meeting consisted of Lil' Man's DFACS worker, her supervisor, our agency's director, and Lil' mans therapeutic worker myself, and the hubs.

The DFACS supervisor wanted him placed in a therapeutic home in which one parent stays home.  I commented that I didnt think that was a wise move, because he needs to learn to function at school. He cannot have one on one attention for the rest of his life.  I also said that I felt like the FP would get burnt out quickly.  I feel that moving him to another home is only fobbing the "problem" off on someone else, and not fixing it.

Our director said that we were the most qualified foster parents within agency, and that if we couldn't deal she didnt think any of the other families would be able to. She said we've done a great job advocating for him.  She knows we didnt want it to end like this, but its a sad reality.

It was decided that Lil' Man needs more help than we can give him (duh).  Since we live in BFE there is nothing suitable in our area.  He will be going to a residential facility about four hours away.  His case worker predicts that he will be there for 30 days.  We expressed our willingness to take him back if that falls within the recommendations.

I have a feeling they might leave him in the big city, because there are a million more resources specialized schools, daycare's, more professionals, etc than what we have here.

In the end I feel like the right decision has been made.  If he were medically sick we wouldn't think twice about taking him to the hospital for however long it took to get him better.  He is mentally ill, and needs treatment, more so than what we are able to offer.  I am gonna miss that lil bugger.  I really hope he ends up back in our care until he is adopted.


  1. so many mixed emotions. about a month ago I said good bye to our first child that moved out of our home. it was under good circumstances, we decided not to adopt him and he moved from our house to a family that committed to adopting was under the best of circumstance and was/is still hard.

    i think this is right for now and i hope so much someone will be able to help him.

  2. hugs, hoping that the move can help stabilize him and get him into a managable routine.