Monday, August 23, 2010


I am sitting at work with all my chores completed waiting until its time to pick Willie-B up from pre-school.  I hate being alone these days. 

When I'm alone the only thing I think about is my little belly bean.  How far along I would be.  Wondering if it were a boy or a girl.  (I think it was a boy).

I hate that greif and sadness are once again ruling my life.  Right now I'm stuck in the why me stage. 

I've wanted to be a mother as long as I can remember.  I sat patiently waiting my turn as everyone around me gave  birth.

Everyone keeps saying don't worry it will happen again soon.  But I don't want a different baby I want my little bean.

Please forgive my typos and spelling mistakes I posted this from my phone.

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  1. You have the right to grieve as long as it takes and in whatever form works for you. I hope that you can forgive those well-meaning remarks. People are trying to support you in the best way they can and there's nothing that can be said that can actually help you feel better, that can actually bring your baby back to you but they try. Peace...

  2. you are right. it's not fair. period.

  3. I totally get it! I've been there 3 times. I wish I had something enlightening to say, but everyone is different. There are some great support groups/forums online if that might be helpful?

  4. You will always miss your Belly Bean and that is ok. Hopefully one day you can think of him and smile. Love you Karen. Give yourself time.