So here I thought rages where a thing of the past. We were playing in the back yard last night. Lil' man was driving the power wheels. He kept running over the landscaping (on purpose) so I told him he could no longer drive. I told him he could ride in it while one of the other kids drove. He threw down, hitting, kicking, screaming and moaning. I hate it when he moans he's sounds so angry. I tired talking to him but he couldnt hear me. I scooped him up and took him inside before one the neighbors called DFACS. He was screaming that loud.
Brining him inside really pissed him off. I was trying to talk to him, but he was so into his rage he couldn't hear me. The kid was so angry, he pooped himself.
After 45 minutes of him screaming, and moaning, he finally clamed down. He was soaking wet with sweat, and so tired.
For the passed month he has been picking on a daily basis. He comes home from school with blood on his clothes. His sheets are permanently stained with blood.
I wonder if its to do with the adoption, or if his meds are no longer working for him. I hate hate hate, that he has so much anger.
I would guess the adoption just ratcheted everything up a notch and he is on overload. I can't be easy to be 5 and have so many places not want you :(
ReplyDeleteIts hard being a foster parent, and not adopting the children. We care about him, and want the best for him. But our home/family is not his forever.
ReplyDeleteThat hurts my heart. I so wish i could come spend a weekend with you and work with him. I LOVE him. If I didn't have my kids OR if they were older he would SO BE MINE - But, I am a strong believer in NOT disrupting birth order. So - I wonder what would happen if you just LET him melt down with no intervention at all. I know he would totally destroy things and go nuts...BUT... If he could learn that he will get absolutely NO attention from this kind of behavior you may be able to extinguish at least some of it. I so want to get my hands on him! NOT literally of course...I live for this kind of kiddo! :)
ReplyDeleteWhen we first got him, we let him "go nuts" without stepping in. We would put him in his room, and we would sit in the doorway to stop him from getting out and trashing the house. But he would trash his room, hit, kick, spit, call names etc for hours. This was a weekly, sometimes daily accuracy . They do happen less often, (once a month) and you can reason with him now. They dont last any where near as long. He has made great progress, and I believe he still has room to grow. I worry about his aggression when he's older, and also his IQ.
ReplyDeleteI hope he gets adopted soon, because he deserves a forever family.
Katie, part of the problem with FAS children is that they dont learn like typical children, they don't remember things, they act on impulse. So even if I did ignore him (which I have done before) he wont remember it next time when the trigger goes off in his little head. I talk to him to help deescalate the situation.
ReplyDeleteTalking to him didn't help when we first got him and the rages would last for hours. Now we are able to clam him down, and talk to him before it gets to the point of rage. But there are times like the other day where there is no talk to him.
Can you tell me what you would do differently
i think you do great with him. truly, he sounds do much better than he was, that has to say something.
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